Okay, the original intention of this blog was not to share funny stories (and admittedly, I've been doing so because I've been without a home computer and had to log them somewhere before I forgot, like, how sad is THAT) but rather funny/interesting/whatever parenting experiences. The current one being, "Is my child Sybil? When should I get worried?"
To clarify: Several parents warned me that the terrible threes were worse than the twos. I find this to be both true and false. False in that I can actually (generally) reason with her to some degree, whereas a two-year-old is, like, deaf to anything you say, mostly because they can't hear anything over their own whining. And true because there is still whining, only now it's strategic whining. I can't say which is worse--whining makes my ears hurt regardless.
But the big thing to me--and this takes me by surprise every time, meaning I must have a really slow learning curve--is how she can go from being a delightful, laughing, joyful child to complete, histrionic meltdown in, like a nanosecond. I mean, seriously; sometimes you can predict what's going to be a trigger, other times, it's like she's received orders from Mars or something: cue meltdown NOW! T likened her meltdown visage to the witch from "Army of Darkness" (which, if you haven't seen it, what are you doing here? Go watch it!) and it's not a bad comparison. Applicable adjectives include shrieking, livid, face-melting (not literally), and banshee-like.
"Exorcist" comparisons (also apt) aside, I think it's the sheer unpredictability of it that really gets me. This morning, for example, we were having a fine old time getting ready for daycare, chitchatting, tickling, etc. And then... then I said "no" to the "pirate treasure" (a bag of colored gems) that she wanted to bring in the car, knowing full well that they would end up all over the seats and floor. And oh, did the toddler hit the fan. The neighbors must have thought that I was slaughtering a cat. Either that, or they're reporting me to Health and Human Services for child abuse. And I just stared at her as she writhed on the floor in absolute toddler rage.
So... here's my question. Is she the only one like this? Is there hope for this ever passing? Should I just go ahead and bring in a priest and call it a day? Seriously--anecdotes, advice, and psychiatric help are all welcome here.
And I will close with a funny, if only because those get filed under Things Keeping Me From Returning My Daughter To The Hospital For A Refund: Last night, she was running (I'm sorry, with a toddler that should be the default assumption, I suppose) down the hallway after her bath, me telling her for the zillionth time to walk, and she slipped and totally ate it. I picked her up and she was crying, pointing in the general direction of her face. I asked, "What did you hit?" and she sobbed, "The ground." I probably shouldn't laugh, should I?
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5 comments:
I remember a lot of tantrums being thrown when my oldest daughter was 3. In fact, that summer I remember pretty much every night ended with a tantrum.
At the time, we lived in a quiet neighborhood with lots of young kids, so every summer night the parents would hang out and talk in the street while the kids played. It was a great setup...it's just that I remember most nights either Kristi or I carrying a screaming child back down the street to our house. They would play so nicely for a couple of hours after dinner...but it would never end well.
I also remember one famous meltdown that happened while trying to get then-3-year-old Kacie ready for day care. For some reason this morning she was refusing to sit in her car seat and was trying to wander all around the car (a Jeep Cherokee at that time, so there was room for her to move around and escape as I tried to grab her and plop her in the seat.) Somehow during all of this -- as she was screaming bloody murder -- I must have hit a stored number in my cell phone, so the phone (as I found out later) dialed a friend of mine.
Later that day he forwarded me the 5-minute voice-mail that I "left" for him which featured my screaming child and my performance sure to earn me a Parent of the Year nomination. At various times during the tantrum I used bribery, yelling, threats...pretty much everything you're NOT supposed to do.
This was nearly 5 years ago and the friend still has no children...I think I'm largely responsible for that.
My only advice to you in your situation, I suppose, is to start drinking in the mornings. (OK, OK, who am I kidding? Drink MORE in the morning than you already are!)
Now, THAT is a great story. Wow. I can only hope to leave such a legacy. Although I think that Alexandra's already serving as some pretty effective birth control for our neighbors.
And true... that is why mimosas and Bloody Marys were invented...
I've always wondered why the "obstinate threes" has not become a part of our lexicon like the "terrible twos" has.
Hannah's meltdowns were legendary, in that she developed language so early and so thoroughly. Her tantrums were usually accompanied with phrases like, "You're killing me!" and "I want to die."
The kid's got a future as a horror movie screenwriter/novelist.
Chuck, you're not giving me much hope that this, too, shall pass...
And once again: your avatar freaks the crap out of me.
Yeah, I thought the creepy kid from Deliverance would be esoteric enough for most, but still have the desired effect for all of the "cool people." Thanks for noticing! :)
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